On the Ice Queen's watch
by m-is-for-MollyMansfieldMealing
Summary: Just an idea I got from watching next weeks episode trailer. Connie is blamed for a fellow colleague's death.
1. Chapter 1

**Just a little idea that the trailer for next week's episode gave me. I prefer to write nicer Connie but this was a nice change :) Enjoy and please review! -Sophie x**

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><p>"All this happened on your watch Connie!" Charlie had shouted, running his hands though his hair. The two were stood in Connie's office during the aftermath of the collision. Connie was stood against the wall with her head back and arms folded, breathing slowly whilst Charlie stood in front of her desk.<p>

"I know but Ash was driving! This is hardly my fault is it?" she said incredulously, straightening herself and staring at Charlie with her piercing eyes. He looked down, arms still folded. Connie suddenly realised what he was thinking.

"Surely you don't think it's my fault?" the doctor said in disbelief. Still, her colleague said nothing.

"Oh come on Charlie!"

"Look" he finally looked up, "I'm not looking for someone to blame, I'm just saying if you hadn't have suggested this trip out, this would nver have happened!"

"For god's sake, I'm only trying to improve the ED! Make it a better place to work? To be treated? Is that so bad?"

"No but-"

"Do you not want better equipment?"

"Yes! But-"

"Do you not want a better survival rate?"

"Yes! But-"

"Then let me do my job!" She finished angrily, her voice raised.

"I KNOW IT'S YOUR JOB CONNIE BUT IF IT WASN'T FOR YOUR STUPID OUTING TO A FAILING ED, _NOT EVEN IN THIS COUNTY_, ETHAN WOULDN'T BE LYING IN RESUS FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFE!" Charlie shouted, his face red with fury that had finally boiled over, and his hands clenched at his sides.

Connie was stunned into silence for the first time in her life. She stared at him with a fuelling hatred, she could feel it bubbling up inside her as she stepped forward towards him.

"Get out." She hissed, glaring straight at him.

"Happily." He spat back and he turned to walk away.

"AND DON'T COME BACK!" The clinical lead screamed after him. Her colleague replied by slamming the door as hard as he could, much to the confusion of the other doctors and nurses outside.

Connie sunk back into her chair, trying to slow her breathing down. The doctor had told her all this stress was bad for her health, but to Connie, her job and reputation came first. Besides, having medical problems made her seem weak. They didn't call her "the ice queen" for nothing.

However, a small part of her, deep inside, knew where Charlie was coming from. The idea was a little ambitious, even for her, driving all the way to Wiltshire just to visit an ED. She had been the one to tell Ash to speed up, and that they wouldn't have enough time otherwise. She was the one to tell Ethan to stop looking at the map for a minute and to wind the window down for Lily who was feeling nauseous. It was all her her her.

"NO!" she said sharply, hitting her hand on her desk. "None of this was your fault at all. It was whoever crashed into us. Stop being so stupid."

All of a sudden there was a knock at the door.

"Come in." she called. The door opened and Tess popped her head around the door frame. She was now wearing her normal clothes as her work uniform had been ripped during the crash.

"I came to give you an update on Ethan. I'm afraid we lost his pulse 15 minutes ago, and there's been no output since. I'm sorry but we had to let him go." She said quietly.

For the second time today, she was lost for words. Once she came to her senses, she realised Tess had tears running down her face.

"I feel so responsible, I mean, I could have helped him, even saved him. But I let him die. He was right next to me and I watched him go. Oh god." She sobbed, leaning face first against the door frame. "What have I done?"

Connie didn't know what to do. She didn't deal with emotional things very well. Slowly, she rose from her chair and walked over to where the woman was stood crying. She hesitantly put her arms around her tiny frame, and held her close like she did with her daughter. Tess leant into her and howled, clutching at her top with her small hands. Connie made soothing noises and rubbed her back slowly.

"He's never coming back." Tess sobbed, and the reality of just what Connie had inadvertently caused, hit her like a train.

Dr Ethan Hardy was dead, and it was all her fault, no matter what she told herself.

Her eyes welled with tears and she too started to cry, ever so quietly.

The ice queen had melted.


	2. Chapter 2

**A little addition to my (originally) one shot! Thank you to, and dedicated to Curious Rebel for the inspiration :D -Sophie x**

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><p>Connie had just exited her office after making herself look less like she'd been crying, when Cal came storming round the corner, his eyes blazing with anger and tears. He spotted his boss and walked straight towards her.<p>

"How could you let this happen?!" He shouted, walking right up to her so his face was inches from hers. She took a step back.

"Cal, calm down." Connie said as professionally as she could without her voice wavering from fear. She'd heard the stories floating around her staff- she knew what he was cape able of. Cal stepped towards her again, hot, angry tears now falling down his cheeks.

"Don't you dare tell me to calm down! I have just lost my only brother because of YOU." He hissed, jabbing his finger into her chest. She leaned back.

"Cal please move away from me."

"No. You killed him, you killed Ethan! You deserve every rotten thing you get."

"Dr Knight! Move away from her!" Tess said angrily as she found the two by the nurses station.

He turned to face her. "It's her fault he's gone." He shouted angrily, wiping away his tears. "If it wasn't for her stupid little outing, he'd still be here."

"Cal don't blame Dr Beauchamp, please. Blame me if you must, I was there when he died, it was my fault- I didn't do enough for him." Tess said quickly, tears starting to form in her eyes too as she started to believe what she was saying.

Connie all the while edged slowly round the nurses desk whilst he was shouting, and moved to where he could see her.

"Cal, please. There is nobody to blame for this, it was no-ones fault. Tess couldn't have done anything more for him if she tried so don't believe a word she is saying." Connie said calmly, looking to her side at the sister.

Cal ran his hands through his hair, trying to breathe normally. He glanced down the corridor where his brother lie cold and covered in blood, in the middle of resus.

"My brother. Is dead. My little brother, who I promised my mum I'd look after, is gone. I've broken that promise, because of you!" His face became angrily red again. "And nothing is going to change that."

"Dr Knight, I ap-" The clinical lead began before he cut her off.

"You what? You apologise? Hah, fat lot of use that is. What's your apology going to do, eh? Bring him back?" He laughed, his face delirious. Many patients and nurses were now watching the shouting match going on in the middle of cubicles in total silence.

"No but I thought it might help a little." She said, her voice beginning to shake when he started to move towards her. Tess moved infront of him quickly.

"Cal, no or I shall have to call sec- argh!" She said before he shiver her out of the way. Making his way to Connie, he spoke again.

"God, I can't believe I once fancied you, Connie Beauchamp. You have destroyed my life, and not in the way I once wanted." He said through gritted teeth, and before anyone could stop him, he slapped her around the face. Connie staggered back in total shock, feeling her cheek sting where his fingers had made contact with her. All of a sudden, she was filled with rage.

"Callum Knight, you exit this Emergency Department right now otherwise security will be called." Connie shouted at the top of her voice. Cal stalked straight by her, shoulder barging her as he went.

"AND DONT COME BACK." She screamed after him.

Tess came over and put her arm around her before Connie shrugged it off.

"I don't need your sympathy." She said bitterly before walking straight to her office, locking the door and closing the blinds. There, she sat at her desk and cried once again, for the second time that day. She felt a little bad about her actions- shouting at Cal who'd just lost his brother, and snapping at Tess who was only trying to help.

She'd apologise the next day, she thought as she buried her head in her hands. It had been too much of an emotional day. What she needed was a large glass of red, an early night, and a new job.


End file.
